How to Start a Conversation on a Dating App

Starting a conversation on a dating app can sometimes feel like stepping into the unknown. You don’t have the usual social cues like body language or tone of voice, so it’s all about the words you choose. The right opener can set the stage for a great interaction, while the wrong one might end the conversation before it even begins. As a love coach, I’ve helped many clients find success in online dating, and I’m here to guide you through the process of starting meaningful and engaging conversations on apps like Tinder, Bumble, and more. Let’s dive into the best ways to start a conversation on a dating app.

Understand the Importance of the Profile

Before you even think about how to message someone on a dating app, you need to take a close look at their profile. This is where many people go wrong, sending generic messages like “Hey, how’s it going?” or “You look nice.” While these aren’t terrible, they don’t stand out or give the other person much to engage with.

For example, If you match with someone whose profile mentions their love for hiking, a great opener could be: “Hi! I noticed you love hiking. Do you have a favorite trail? I’ve been looking for new places to explore.”

This is one of the best ways to start a dating app conversation because it’s personalized and shows that you’ve taken the time to read their profile. It also makes it easier for them to respond, starting your conversation off on the right foot.

Craft the Perfect Opener

When thinking about how to start a chat on Tinder or Bumble, open-ended questions are your best friend. They encourage the other person to share more and help the conversation flow naturally. Instead of questions that can be answered with a simple “yes” or “no,” ask something that invites them to share more about themselves.

For example, instead of saying “Do you like movies?” try saying “What’s the best movie you’ve seen this year and what did you love about it?”

This is a prime example of the best questions to ask on dating apps because it gives the other person room to respond in detail, keeping the conversation engaging.

Flirty Openers for Dating Apps: Adding a playful, flirty element can work well too. For example, if their profile mentions pets, you could say: “Ok, let’s settle this debate—who’s better: cats or dogs? I’m guessing you’re Team Dog 🐶, but I could be wrong!”. 

Use Impressive Pickup lines: You must use flirty smooth good pick up lines to get their attention and impress the other person. You can say “I must be a snowflake because I’ve fallen for you” OR “Are you a library book? Because I can’t stop checking you out.”

This kind of playful opener is a great way to start a conversation on Tinder or Bumble, adding a lighthearted tone that makes it easier for the other person to respond.

Use Thoughtful Openers

Being thoughtful and genuine is key when you’re figuring out how to start meaningful conversations on dating apps. Personalizing your opener based on something in their profile shows that you’re genuinely interested, and it helps to break the ice.

An example of a thoughtful opener would be if someone posts and mentions they love traveling, you could say: “You’ve got some amazing travel pics! What’s your favorite place you’ve been to, and do you have a dream destination?”

This shows interest in their experiences and provides a natural way to keep the conversation going.

Incorporate Emojis and Humor

Knowing how to engage on dating apps often means balancing sincerity with a little fun. Emojis can add a playful tone to your messages, helping you avoid any misunderstandings that might happen with text alone.

For example, Instead of just saying, “That sounds fun,” you can say, “That sounds fun 😄!” The emoji adds a friendly and approachable vibe, making it clear that your message is upbeat.

Using humor is another great tip for starting conversations on Bumble or Tinder. You don’t need to be a stand-up comedian, but a little playful banter can help set the mood for a great interaction.

Real-Life Example: If someone mentions they’re a coffee lover, you could say: “Okay, I have to know—what’s your go-to coffee order? Because my caffeine game is seriously lacking ☕.”

This keeps the conversation light and playful, while also giving them something fun to respond to.

Dos and Don’ts of Starting Conversations

If you’re wondering how to start a conversation on a dating app without making it awkward, here are some basic dos and don’ts:

Do:

• Personalize your opener reference something specific in their profile to show genuine interest.
• Ask questions that’ll keep the conversation going and will shows that you want to learn more about them.
• Be respectful as this will make a good impression of your’s.
• Give them compliments, but avoid anything that feels too forward or uncomfortable.

Don’t:

• Send one-word messages like “Hey” or “Hi.” These don’t invite any sort of meaningful conversation.
• Start with heavy topics rather keep the conversation light and fun at the beginning to make the conversation feel natural.
• Overwhelm them with multiple messages, if they don’t respond right away, give them space.

By following these tips for starting conversations on Bumble or Tinder, you’ll increase your chances of sparking a meaningful connection.

Keep the Conversation Going

Now that you know how to start a chat on Tinder or any other dating app, let’s talk about how to keep a conversation going on dating apps. One of the best ways to maintain the flow is by asking follow-up questions that show you’re engaged in the conversation.

For example, If they mention they love cooking, you could follow up with: “That’s awesome! What’s your favorite dish to cook? I’m always looking for new recipes to try.”

This keeps the conversation moving and provides a natural transition into new topics.

Sharing Your Own Stories: While asking questions is important, don’t forget to share a little about yourself too. Conversations are a two-way street, and sharing your experiences will help build a connection.

Real-Life Example: If they mention they love the beach, you could say: “I love the beach too! I went to [specific place] last summer and it was amazing. Have you been there before?”

By adding personal stories, you make the conversation feel more balanced and engaging. You can check out this article for further tips on online dating messages.

Wrapping It Up: Asking for the Next Step

Once you’ve had a good conversation, it’s time to think about taking it to the next step. Knowing when and how to ask for a phone number or suggest a meetup can be tricky, but keeping it light and respectful will usually do the trick.

For example, “I’ve really enjoyed chatting with you! Would you be up for grabbing a coffee sometime? I’d love to keep getting to know you.”

This approach is casual and respectful, making it easy for them to say yes or politely decline without feeling pressured.

Handling Rejection Gracefully

Not every conversation will lead to a connection, and that’s perfectly fine. If someone doesn’t respond, don’t take it personally. It’s important to move on gracefully and not dwell on it.

If the conversation fizzles, you can thank them for chatting and wish them luck in their search. Every interaction is an opportunity to learn more about what works for you in the world of online dating.

Conclusion

Starting a conversation on a dating app doesn’t need to be intimidating. By following these simple dating app conversation tips—whether you’re crafting the best openers for dating apps or learning how to message someone on a dating app—you’ll set yourself up for success. Remember, the goal is to have fun, be yourself, and engage in meaningful conversations that could lead to a real connection. With these techniques, you’ll know how to start a conversation on a dating app that stands out and keeps things interesting. Good luck!

By following these tips and being mindful of how you communicate, you’ll be well on your way to mastering dating app conversations and forming meaningful connections.

FAQs

How do I avoid awkward silences in conversations?

Keep the conversation flowing by asking follow-up questions and sharing stories. Stay engaged by showing genuine interest in what they have to say.

Should I use humor when messaging someone on a dating app?

Absolutely! Humor is a great way to break the ice and make the conversation more enjoyable, but make sure your jokes are light-hearted and inoffensive.

How soon should I ask to meet in person?

This depends on how the conversation is going. If the vibe is good and both parties seem comfortable, you can suggest meeting after a few days of chatting. However, don’t rush it—let it feel natural.